Tolerations are insidious things that subliminally annoy you and sap your energy so it’s really important to zap them. While making a list of the things (big and small) you are tolerating may seem a bit negative, some magic gets to work when you do…
Clicks And Leads is a “tongue in cheek” digital marketing Vzine by entrepreneur, author, podcaster, speaker, Nicola Cairncross.
Mentioned in the Vzine
On the blog
- Ideal Clients
- DIY, DWY or DFY?
- List Segmentation
- Are You Getting Paid?
- Entrepreneurial Loneliness
- Mental Models
- Automatic Customers
- Six Figure Mentors Review
- Own It! 207 | Buying A Business No Money Down
- Own It! 206 | Rhys Morgan: Podcasting From Scratch
- Vzine 79 – All Change Again!
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Welcome everyone, it’s Nicola here. And it’s the Clicks and Leads Vzine and today I’m basking in the glow not only of some glorious sunshine, although I woke up this morning to pouring rain.
It’s one or the other here. It’s nothing in between. None of that drizzle business. It’s either pouring biblically or it’s sunny. And yeah, it’s absolutely amazing so I’m going out later on, which will be nice because I’ll be able to sit in the sunshine.
And the other thing that I’m basking in the glow of, is the deflected glow of a job well done.
You know how around the house you get those niggly little jobs and, you know, I had some lights out in the kitchen and there was a light out over on those spotlights over here. And I just tried everything.
I tried borrowing a step ladder. I tried getting my sister to stand on a chair. I tried getting my sister to stand on the work-top but neither of us could reach them and we couldn’t work out how to get the lights out so we could go and buy some more.
Finally, my landlord responded to my appeals and he came down with a very big step ladder and he kindly took all the bulbs out that were blown. I bought some more and he came back and put them all in again for me. So I’m feeling, you know, I’m feeling the joy of a toleration busted and it’s an even more joyous thing when it’s busted by someone else.
So let’s get on with the show, shall we?
So I mentioned toleration busting in the intro and it’s a very well known coaching tool that you sit down and you write down all the things you’re tolerating. And the premise is that every toleration is a bit of an energy suck for you.
So every time you look at that thing, like every time I turned my lights on and thought, “Oh, it’s a bit dim in the kitchen”, it was sucking a little bit of my energy out of me. And if you look around your house, there’s all these things that you’re putting up with and the point is that successful, wealthy people wouldn’t put up with things, they would point at something and they would go,”Fix that” or “Get that done” or “Can we get that done?”, and it would be fixed and they wouldn’t have to look at it anymore. So it wouldn’t be sucking their energy.
So it’s always a good idea to have a little list of things that you’re tolerating and what magically happens, it happens every time I do this, every time I make a list of things I’m tolerating, someone comes along and fixes one or two of them for me. Or they just mention something that would fix the toleration or they say that they’ve seen something on eBay or in a local shop for example.
Another thing I’m tolerating is my wood burning stove. It needs some caulking around the side of the inside bit that fits you where you shut the door. And I’ve had a guy around who put some caulking on and it promptly fell off again, and I’ve heard that you had to go to Kalamata to get caulking.
But since then, I’ve just been occasionally aware that I need to find somewhere to buy caulking and a friend just popped up the other day and said you could get it in Kardamyli Arkwright’s. So I’m going to drive over there and take a bit of the existing caulking and hopefully I’ll be able to buy some more and it’s sticky already so hopefully I won’t need glue. But if I do, I’ll buy some.
The point is, that my friend popped up and said “Oh, I’ve heard you can get caulking in Arkwright’s in Kardamyli”. And I wasn’t even thinking about it at that moment and she’s nearly fixed one of my tolerations for me.
So the thing you’ve got to remember is would Richard Branson put up with this? That’s the phrase you’ve got to remember.
Because the less you put up with in your life, the more you get things fixed and up to your specifications your standards. My standards are slightly lower in the housekeeping department than other people’s… Then the less energy you’ll be having sucked out of you.
So if you see something, put it onto your tolerations list even if you don’t intend to do anything about it straight away because magic might happen and someone else might fix it for you.
Things are more likely to get done if they are on a list that you’re carrying around with you or in your diary, or your journal or your notebook. Or on your phone even. Otherwise you’ll just keep putting up with them and it will keep sucking your energy that you could be using for something a lot more important. Let’s put it that way.
I hope this helps. Bust those tolerations. And perhaps do it between Christmas and New Year, that’s always a good downtime to fix things.
What’s on the blog and the podcast this week?
There’s quite a lot more on the blog nowadays if you’ve been over there recently. NicolaCairncross.com/blog.
The daily video is going up there now so I’m covering your ideal client, comparison-itis don’t fall for it, how to find your hungry crowd, and a quick Instagram tip and how do you become more accountable.
On Own It! Episode 206 Rhys Morgan. We interviewed him and he was actually ostensibly talking about podcasting from scratch but he told us a bit of his fascinating backstory. He’s an ex-alcoholic who’s been clean now for five years. He was also once a vicar. I wonder if the two are connected. Anyway, go and find out what Rhys has got to say.
These are interviews where we just invite people we know on who we think might be interesting and let them talk for 15 minutes. And we ask them questions about what they’ve said. It’s a novel form of interviewing style, I’ll grant you. But it seems to work for us.
And Vzine 78 is called What’s your alternative? And in that one I talked about how when you’re moaning and whining and griping and complaining really, what’s your alternatives? So if you’re complaining about something, you know, unless you stop complaining and take action, what’s your alternative? You just have to keep putting up with it. And I just think that’s a really brilliant way of reframing it.
So if you catch yourself grizzling, just stop and think to yourself, “What’s my alternative?” Because your alternatives are; to either do something about it, or put up with it. And either way by moaning about it you’re just making yourself and everyone else around you a little bit more miserable.
You can always find all these videos on my YouTube channel at ClicksandLeads.TV Hope you enjoy them. Love to hear your comments. Lots more comments have been coming in that’s really cool. So let me know wherever you’re watching I’m following my comments everywhere, on the blog, on the podcast, on the YouTube channel, on Facebook, on Twitter, on LinkedIn, you can get me anywhere. Just comment and I’ll be there. Have a fantastic week everyone. Bye.
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